It has been. I am not sure why it has been so long since I have been here. I think maybe becasuse I am happy. I only say maybe because I dont know what happiness feels like. I dont think I do. I thought I knew what happiness was but that hurt me. Now this is happiness but I am confused deep down cause I feel like this might not be the way I am meant to be feeling. Nothing really has changed to be honest. If you think about it what really has changed? My surroundings and my job that's about it. I am meant to feel happy and meant to feel good about where I am right now but how is that possible, how can I be happy and be the way I want to be when all I feel is constant push back.
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