hello friend. it doesnt feel like i am typing but i am. feels weird right? that this is the life i will be living for ever. i feel so strange like i am going to be forever stuck in a world that continusaly repeats its self and that not matter what happens i will not be able to shake it off. this is like a companion blog. i have to go and figure things out for my self. all i do is live when do i rest am i allowed to rest who says i can and cannot. i think i have a fear of being a failure because all i heard growing up was that i am a faliure and i now know why i am the way i am when it comes to hearing other people feelings its because when i would tell my parents how i felt they would only listen to repsond they would never actually listen to my feelings and try to understand why i am the way i am or try to make me feel better. i remember this now its so clear. remembe rwhen you would tell them that the way you were feeling and they would alwaysing thing you were attachkin them when in facy all i was doing was expressing my emotion and that when i did to that they would always so here we go oh your being this and that and now i do the same thing. jeeeez the after effect your parents have on you is real and ever lastering
